For those of you who can’t, here’s a transcript of the lyrics.
This song, “This Party Just Took a Turn for the Douche,” made by the duo of Garfunkel & Oates, is great current example both of SPWLism and SWPLism hypocrisy.
1. Band Members
The song is sung (and seemingly written by) two semi-attractive white women in their late 20s/early 30s. The blond, taller one, Riki Lindhome is an actress I swear I have seen before, but in passing. She’s the prettier of the two, but in a plain way. Despite rolling around in the video doing suggestive, stripper-esque club-girl hump-dancing while wearing outfits that show off a nice body, she seems awkward, unsure of herself, and profoundly uncomfortable; she seems to have been either a fat girl who lost the weight or else a band geek wallflower who only recently lost the braces and acne.
The second, smaller, uglier, but contradictorily cuter one, Kate Micucci, has been on that SWPL-beloved show, Scrubs, where she played a character called The Gooch. She appears in the video as more sarcastic, more nasty, more boyish, and more at home with mockery and superciliousness; I would not be surprised if she is a bitter lesbian, or turns into one someday for publicity/faux-rebelliousness purposes.
2. Band Name
The band’s name, Garfunkel & Oates, is classic hipster/SWPL identifiers. It’s first name, Garfunkel, references a “deep” pop group from the 60s, Simon & Garfunkel. Next, in Oates, it references a successful, but “cheesy” (according to SWPLs and their sarcasm meters) 80’s pop band, Hall & Oates. Finally, both names are the names of the lesser-known, secondary members of the duos they reference. Thus, in one fell swoop, you get a band name that 1) shows them to be “intelligent” because they listen to “deep” music; 2) makes fun of the 80’s; 3) shows off their music-history nerdiness; and 4) makes their band name “ironic.”
This band couldn’t be more hipster in their band name than if they named themselves the “PBR Crew from Williamsburg, featuring Knitting, Ironically Tatooed Riot Grrrls who vote Democrat.”
The lyrics of the song are classic name-dropping of things that reference SWPLism. Some examples:
Arrested Development: “I ain’t George Michael Bluth”
Say Anything: “I’m holding up the beats like I was Lloyd Dobbler”
Critically acclaimed novelists of the post 1950s (i.e. bad, boring novelists who went to parties with left-wing critics of the time ): “We’re an army in the night, like Norman Mailer“; AND
“Higher than the voice of Truman Capote”
Gay-love: the aforementioned Truman Capote; many of the douchebag parodies hitting on/making out with women in the video are other women doing impressions of thuggish-wanna be men, including Sarah Silverman—similar to butch lesbians;
Right-wing bashing: “pop my collar like Limbaugh pops oxy”
and a bass line that cribs directly from a cheesy-rap song about inner city gangstas being victims, used as the soundtrack to a movie about poor high school children being just misunderstood and victimized, not bad people Gangsta’s Paradise.
4. Theme and Hypocrisy
Most importantly, however, is the entire theme of the song, which is mocking and making fun of the way white underclass people act in club/party scenes today, especially those ones who are socially dominant in their peer group. The Jersey Shore-esque wannabe’s—the Situations, the Snookis who “invade” the SWPLer’s space and ruin their good time.
It would only be one social group insulting another if not for the massive hypocrisy involved in the song.
You see, Garfunkel & Oates are insulting the proles for acting like low-class ghetto black people, the kind of people that Garfunkel & Oates would never criticize for their behavior.
Let’s not mince words here: the Jersey Shore crowd and the “douchebags” made fun of here and at websites such as Hotchickswithdouchebags are only mimicking the black culture that SWPLers not only have never criticized, but openly celebrate.
More specifically, Garfunkel & Oates make fun of several things about the prolish douchebags:
—over-worked out bodies by the men
—excessive care of facial hair/self-grooming
—use of fragrances by men
—girls wearing clear heels
—people only out for a one night stand
—dropping excess money for relative trifles (“drop a G for the bottle of goose”)
Every single category in which they insult the douchebags came from black ghetto culture. But would these two SWPLs or their audience ever dare point a finger at the black ghetto culture that led the way for this lifestyle becoming dominant, or else criticize black people for acting this way?
For SWPls, white and successful asian people acting this way are acting low class, pathetic, and immature. But slap this behavior on blacks on Hispanic “authentic” minorities—i.e. minorities who vote Democrat—and suddenly it’s “real” and “truthful” and a “deep expression of their fundamental oppression and anger” or whatever other bullshit is being bandied about these days in racial studies courses.
Garfunkel & Oates, like all SWPLs, wants what all lefties want: special, better-than-you rules for black and other ghetto-minority behavior (so long as said minorities are only leftists, which 99% are). SWPLs refuse to recognize or criticize ghetto behavior as destructive, socio-pathic, or childish unless it is adopted by non-ghetto minorities, in which case it is open season.
In short, despite Garfunkel & Oates’s intense name-dropping to “prove” their intelligence, they ultimately come off as ignorant and dumb, despite the song’s catchiness (I have it on my iPod) and initial clever-sounding lyrics. Because of p.c.-dogma, their brains are incapable of understanding the root causes of the behavior they loathe in prole whites; their own hypocrisy and cowardice in writing and performing this son; and how the cultural dominance (and culture-destroying nature) of this behavior that they loathe is something that SWPL-dogma has perpetuated.
This just in: SWPL are morons.